There was a time in my life when I was
in love with someone who had not the same feelings for me, and
please, believe me when I say that I'm not talking about the person
you're thinking right now. It wasn't just the ''I-don't-feel-loved''
kind of thing, it was more, way more. I was in my last year at high
school, struggling to find a TRUE group of friends who would accept
me as I really was. I had been basically surrounded by lots of
people, but I was alone. And things were not going well at home,
definitely not. I would often feel depressed, like I'd cry 4 of 7
days, for no reason, I mean, I would have a reason during that time.
I was trapped inside myself, I often thought people would never know
the real me, I thought that if I shared my feelings or my thoughts,
my real ones, I would be excluded and everyone would think I was
nuts. I had never thought about taking away my life or any crazy
stuff like that, and it's funny how suicide would eventually become a
cause close to my heart during that time. There were some things I
was not supposed to know while growing up and I would learn about
those situations later: getting to know those situations really
helped me to understand almost everything that was going through. Now
I just close my eyes and I take a look back at the past, but I don't
stop, I see the present, and I keep on walking on my road to the
future. I think I've been through a lot in my childhood, but I
certainly made it through, you can just see that I'm in a better
place right now, physically and most importantly, mentally.
University was a huge, ENORMOUS change in my life: I'm more
open-minded, free, mature, and happy, I'm happier, I'M MYSELF. I've
found people who I love and people who loves me, there have been ups
and downs, I have experienced new things, I am experiencing new
things and all I can say is: I'm myself, I thank you for reading this
and probably be one of those who have made this possible.
Antonio/Nica.
